BAD FINANCIAL DECISIONS’
I have seen too many men mess up their family finance as a result of bad financial decisions and there are so many of those decisions men make. I often tell men that manhood or headship in the home isn’t the same as financial intelligence. Once you are not intelligent financially you can’t fake it or faith it. Women have proven in so many quarters to be better money managers and investors than men and this is because they relate and intermeddle with information better than men. Women are the ones who go around a lot and they hear latest gists about everything in most cases. I am not saying you should trust financial decisions into the hands of your wife if she is a spend thrift. What I am saying is that you need to carry her along in your financial decisions because her instinct might just be enough to save you because men take reckless risks sometimes which usually spell doom for the family. I have seen men reject their spouse’s financial counsel only to go and listen to a friend or a single girl out there who doesn’t even care about you
. One of the most stupid financial decision a man can make is keeping his investment and financial decisions away from his wife. If you can’t trust her with your money why did you marry her? If you think she is a spend thrift what have you done to groom her? A man makes good money and owns several bank account that his wife isn’t privy to only to die and for his family to go broke while the bank feeds on his money. How many families are suffering simply because the wife is not a co-signatory to the account after the demise of the man? Why would you allow your family go through the stress of probate after your demise and share your wealth with the government when making your wife a co-signatory would have made life easier. If u can trust her with your private parts and your food why not your money? We used to make a joke in those days as consultants and trainers to some banks in the country that there are banks that can never go down not because their marketers are bringing new funds but because they have the funds of dead men whose families never knew they had money stored in such a bank. I always make it a point of duty never to be a sole signatory to any account and I am not sure there is any account I have that my wife doesn’t have access to including the details of it’s online transactions. Couples who keep their finances away from each other have a serious problems trusting themselves and the solution is just a full day financial intelligence session away from them. My finances were messed up years ago simply because I was playing the man yet I had no financial intelligence. I never saw my stupidity and that was when I learnt how not to handle money. By playing a simple game it became obvious that my wife was a better money manager so I have learnt never to argue with her in that regards. Couples who don’t talk about finances and sex don’t really talk about anything in reality because those are 2 of the most critical issues that can break any marriage.A lot of men have no will at 40 because they don’t want to die yet while I have seen men whose financial decision is driven by their siblings. How many times have we seen family members render a dead man’s wife and children poor and helpless because they felt they are entitled to the man’s wealth. If you had bought everything in both your names or she were a signatory to your account that would never have happened. You cnt afford to repeat the mistakes of ur father.
One of the greatest bane of married men is their inability to listen to wise counsel. How many times have you been appealed to by your wife to attend a session that is capable of changing your life and help you build trans-generational wealth that you refused under a guise that you know what you are doing? How many times have you lost money simply because you wouldn’t pay attention to her reservation about a business deal you were entering into? How may time has she warned you about a new business partner who later swindled you? Men are sometimes unable to read between the lines and we also fail to apologize when we make a mistake that may cost our family. Are you familiar with ‘Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding………’ If your wife is truly a help meet then you need to learn to listen to her concerns about your spending patterns. Do you have an escrow account as a family? How well can your family survive and for how long if you lose your source of active income at the moment? How many sources of passive income do you have? My mentor often tells me that living your life on a single source of income is like a man sitting on a chair with a single leg and he considers such a man wicked to his family and himself. Can you just calm down for once as a man and get help? It is not about what you earn; it is about what you have left that and you can invest into an asset that can generate monthly passive income. I would recommend his financial intelligence kit for your family. Truth is if you are not financially intelligent you may soon lose all you have and until your financial paradigm changes your life may not change. Men! You need to live on a budget but it starts with sitting with your wife to analyze your current snapshot. Having facilitated hundreds of family finance session for several couples it is so easy to understand the crisis in most families because the sessions clearly shows how ignorant they are about their spending patterns because there is no family budget. When you ask couples to analyze their current snapshot it clearly shows a few revelations which is includes the fact the men’s inability to in clear terms the amount they earn and what they spend. But the most shocking fact during the session is the fact that an average family spend more than they earn and in the words of my financial mentor that is borrowing from your future to service your present. As a matter of fact when you ask them how they cope with spending more than they are earning they tell you ‘I don’t even know how God is doing it’ which my mentor says it’s a statement of irresponsibility. A Jewish proverb says there is more treasure in the reserves of a wise man but the foolish man spends it all. Financial illiteracy has messed up a lot of men and because most of our men are not even aware of their ignorance they never listen to their women to get help. How do you know as a man if your family is at risk? Do you spend more than you earn? Can you maintain your present standard of living if you don’t earn a salary for the next 2years? Does your finance resets itself to zero at the beginning of every year? Do you have an escrow account that is strictly for investment in passive income earning assets and that you never touch no matter what happens? Do you have a clear financial freedom plan that is known both to you and your wife?Do you involve your wife before you give to any course?Do you track your income and expenditure as a family or you are running your individual show?Do U agree with your wife before engaging in any major investment? If ur yes is less than 4 you need help.
On a Survey list of 100 people at 25 on a career path till 65 in America discovered that at 65 -
• 54% are dependent
• 16% are still working
• 24% are dead
• 5% are Independent
• 1% is Free
If this could be happening in America what could be happening in Nigeria? Financial freedom is a state where what you earn passively can take care of all your living expenses. What that means is that what you earn when you are asleep can take care of you when you are awake. I often counsel couples that with proper planning and proper honesty about their finances they can become financially free in 10 years. It will require careful planning and discipline and putting a system in place for your family that ensures you keep an escrow account that the 2 of you never touch apart from investing in passive income generating asset. Think about what you can do with your life and time if you were financially free? Money is the master in most homes right now. It has taken men from their women; women from their men and parents from their children. It has opened our children up to abuse because we no longer spend time with them and it has created communication gap btw couples because the man is running around the world trying to make more money and meeting strange women along the way. Listen what many of you need may not be more money but a proper analysis of your current spending patterns and a disciplined system that can deliver freedom in 10years but I often realize that our men find it difficult to disclose and submit their finances for accountability. Would you rather embrace change and spend more time with your family or keep working till 65 years and get a golden watch long service award?
I once interviewed a 55 year old man who just picked a job as a gate-man on a salary of 15k/month. I could see the frustration all over him and wanted to learn a few things from him and to my utmost surprise he was a man who had made money before but according to him ‘I thought the money would keep coming and squandered everything on wild parties and strange women’ he continued ‘The moment I started making money I completely forgot the woman that suffered with me when I had nothing and never paid attention to her counsel. She tried her best to save me but I treated her badly because I was too proud to listen to my woman’ ‘I realized she was all I had after I lost everything and she was there to see the children through school’ ‘I am a complete shadow of who I used to be and feel really embarrassed with my life however I have decided to do something instead of staying at home’. Men please let’s learn from others because we don’t have to learn the hard way and put our family in financial mess. The same woman you don’t carry along is the same person that might be there to bail you out ultimately. Don’t be afraid to invest in your wife and don’t be afraid to tell her about every financial dealing. Even if you consider her not learned enough her instinct might just be what will save the day for you. Get knowledge and carry your wife along. Don’t grow at her expense lest you become intellectually incompatible.
Today I am not going to speak so much I am just here to ask you a few questions as a man:
- When was the last time you discussed family finance in your home?
- When was the last time you attended a financial intelligence class?
- Who is your financial advisor? Someone who built wealth systematically or a contractor whose template is not duplicable?
- Who holds you accountable about your finances?
- Does your woman know how much you earn from every sources?
- Do you have a family escrow account? An escrow account is an account that is opened whose cheque book is kept with your mentor. It is regarded as the account for your future so you are not permitted to touch the money for any other reason other than investing in a passive income generating asset like real estate(not lands), automated business where you earn director’s bonus; intellectual property where you earn royalty; paper investment where you earn dividends or a reputable network marketing where you earn bonuses(ensure it is well researched before you invest your money and avoid any that hasn’t got any product offering)
- Can your wife access your bank account and do you carry her along in every of your financial decisions?
Truth is your wife is you and you are your wife money shouldn’t separate you because she is your help meet so tap into her natural instinct which may be your saving grace in winter.
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