Misunderstanding Headship In The Home
Anyone that gives a woman the wings to fly is the person she naturally defers to. I tell women to use their men's pix as their DP Instead of their pastors but reality is how do you display the image of a man who beats you and treats you like trash? You claim your wife is not good enough to manage your money yet the entire burden of the church’s finances is on her. Or how do you explain that she has risen through the ranks to become one of the top leaders or HOD in her religious circle yet you can’t trust her with simple decisions at home. Too many women would naturally defer to their pastors because the man delivers value and creates an enabling environment for the gifts in them to thrive.
Little wonder she talks more about ‘my pastor’ than ‘my husband’. Leadership can’t be forced and that is why as a man you need to examine yourself critically to be sure you are a true leader and not a task master. If your wife and your children were asked to vote for the man of the year do you think you would have their votes? And why do you think they would vote for you? If your treatment of your family is what will guarantee your eternity do you think you’d make it into heaven? You can’t afford to keep doing the same thing your father did and it is not too late as a man to humble yourself and get help because men who are wicked to their spouses become lonely when they grow old. Can you apologize to her today for the way you have treated her so far and make a commitment to allowing the baby in her expression without feeling insecure? If you are a true head you’d allow the songs, the books, the ideas, the projects in her come alive and you’d be willing to make sacrifices for her. Are you a true Head?
When was the last time you fixed a meal for your family?
When was the last time you took responsibility for doing the dishes or the children's homework?
Are you really in touch with what is happening in the life of your children?
When was the last time you sat at home to baby sit while allowing her attend a course that can improve her?
When was the last time you trully sacrificed what you ought to have so that she cn improve herself?
When was the last time you truly taught her something new without making it feel you were reading out rules and regulations?
When was the last time you truly chased her the way you did before she said yes?
When was the last time you provided for your family without complaining?
In whose names are your properties bought?
Do you really trust her or are there things you are afraid of?
Can she truly call you 'My husband' or you have become 'Our husband'?
Do you still treat her like your queen or she has become your house help or flat mate? Headship is service and the cost of headship is high as a matter of fact it is sacrifice. A true head loves all the time and true love is a decision that is based on a commitment to consistently add value. It is not about what she is doing to you; it is more about what you have decided to do. I know this could be hard especially if you are married to a woman who has been damaged by the men in her life before you. But there is no situation that true love can't heal if patience is applied.
Food For Thought: If your wife were to be your first daughter will you disown or send her away having noticed her flaws? He that seeks to head a home successfully must become the servant of all.
Praise Fowowe Website
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